PROBLEMS OF ACCENTUATION IN TRANSLATING POETRY, I

(© LEON LEVIȚCHI)

            Accentuation consists, at large, in highlighting or underlining a notion, idea, feeling, attitude, etc. using various linguistic means (phonetic, lexical, grammatical, stylistic means) as well as several extra-linguistic means (gestures, mimicry, pauses etc.).

In communication, there are two main types of information that are sent and received: anaphoric information (information that is supposed to be already known by both the sender and the receiver) and epiphoric information (new information), although in many situations the boundaries between these two categories are not very easy to set. Since language is the most important means of communication, it has specific means for transmitting the two types of information. For example, the main function of the indefinite article is epiphoric, while the definite article mostly achieves the anaphoric function.

e.g. I saw a tall man crossing the street. The man was wearing a black suit.

 – a introduces new information,

- the introduces information already known by the receiver.

A correct process of communication involves the careful and sensible use of the anaphoric element; when the sender of the message does not observe this rule, he will inevitably keep the receiver away from correctly decoding the message.

◙ Underline the anaphoric elements in the following two texts, decide which of them fails to communicate the exact meaning and explain why:

1. “Once upon a time there lived two farmers, and their names were Hudden and Dudden. They had poultry in their yards, sheep on the uplands and scores of cattle in the meadow-land alongside the river.” (Hudden and Dudden, a Celtic folk-tale)

2. “darling! because my blood can sing / and dance (and does that with each your least / your any most very amazing now /or here) let pitiless fear play host / to every isn’t that’s under the spring / - but if a look should april me, / down isn’t’s own isn’t go ghostly they? (E.E. Cummings, Darling)

But, on the other hand, the essential element in communication is not the “old” (familiar, already known) information, but the new element, the epiphoric information. So, if the anaphoric (old) information coexists in communication with the epiphoric (new) information and since the new information represents the essence of communication, then the latter type of information is permanently underlined during this process, because, according to psychology, whatever is new appears as interesting and draws our attention.

Each language has its own system of epiphoric accentuation made up of several subsystems specific to different ages, literary trends, authors and works. A translator has to possess a thorough knowledge of this system of epiphoric accentuation in the TL language because this involves a knowledge of the style specific to the TL language.

Phonetic Stress / Accent

It is the main type of epiphoric accentuation and it refers to a specific stress laid on a sound or group of sounds by a high frequency sound wave. More specifically, this involves stressing the vowel sounds (vowels, diphthongs, triphthongs) in a syllable. There are four types of phonetic accent: tonic stress, syntactic stress, rhetorical stress, rhythmical stress.

a. Tonic stress refers to a syllable in a multi-syllable word or in a group of words which is more stressed than the other syllables. Since the most stressed syllable in a word coincides with its root, this is also called etymological stress. Then, on the other hand, it is principal (main, head) stress as opposed to secondary stress and zero stress (ˏunim`portant).

b. Syntactic stress underlines the logical importance of a word / several words in a sentence. Here, intonation is also involved in underlining those words.

When Emily goes out, she puts on a coat and a hat… the important words are: Emily, goes out, puts on, coat, hat.

c. Rhetorical stress helps the speaker underline a word he wants to bring to the special attention of the listener. Usually, this word is in implicit or explicit contrast with other words.

◙ Practice rhetorical stress with every word that allows for it in the following sentence:

“N. will impersonate Iago at the National Theatre tomorrow.”

Rhetorical stress falls on (a) word(s) that is/are epiphoric, at least from the speaker’s point of view. They mostly represent answers to special questions. The words having a rhetorical stress can be graphically signaled (underlined, italicized, written between inverted commas, etc.)

d. Rhythmical stress or ictus is specific to poetry and therefore of extreme importance for translators. It represents the syntactic stress laid in metric patterns that can be scanned.

i. The foot represents the metric pattern of a line in a poem made up of one stressed syllable and one or more unstressed syllables. There are six foot types:

·         the iambus: one unstressed syllable + one stressed syllable (v-)

·         the trochee: one stressed syllable + one unstressed syllable (-v)

·         the dactyl: one stressed syllable + two unstressed syllables (-vv)

·         the amphibrach: one unstressed syllable + one stressed syllable + one unstressed syllable (v-v)

·         the anapest: two unstressed syllables + one stressed syllable (vv-)

·         the spondee: one stressed syllable (-)

ii. The line is a row of words in a poem made up of one or more feet. For a translator, it is important to render this rhythmical structure because it is the main element of stress. There are seven types of lines, found in both English and Romanian poetry:

·         monometers: one foot

·         dimeters: two feet

·         trimeters: three feet

·         tetrameters: four feet

·         pentameters: five feet

·         hexameters: six feet

·         septameters: seven feet

◙ Identify the type of line used in the following fragments of poems:

a. When you are old and gray and full of sleep,

    And nodding by the fire take down this book… (Yeats)

b. Take her up / tenderly,

     Lift her with care. (Thomas Hood)

c. Long enough your house can held you; up and clear the way. (Swinburne)

d. Best and brightest, come a way!

     Fairer far than this fair Day… (Shelley)

e. Turning,

     Burning,

     Changing,

     Ranging. (J. Addison)

f. ‘Twas sad as sad could be. (Coleridge)

g. What I can ne’er express, yet can not all conceal. (Byron)

Translators should render as faithfully as possible the type of foot and line in a poem, as long as Romanian and English share the same types of foot and lines. There are some differences as far as frequency of use is concerned: English poetry (unlike Romanian poetry) shows preference for the iambus as compared to the trochee; the spondee is rarely used in both English and Romanian poetry; the same is true about monometers.

iii. the stanza  represents a pattern of lines that forms a poem. Although it is not important in point of accentuation, this pattern should be rendered faithfully in the TL.

◙ Comment on the translation of the following Spencerian Stanza, after a close analysis of its structure:

SL

TL

The horrid crags, by toppling convent crown’d,  The cork-trees hoar that clothe the shaggy steep,  The mountain-moss by scorching skies imbrown’d,  The sunken glen, whose sunless shrubs must weep,  The tender azure of the unruffled deep,  The orange tints that gild the greenest bough,  The torrents that from cliff to valley leap,  The vine on high, the willow branch below, Mix’d in one mighty scene, with varied beauty glow.                                                    (Byron)

Genunea larg cӑscatӑ lȃng-un schit,   Torenţi ce-n muchea stȃncilor se frȃng,   Gorunul peste hӑuri prӑvӑlit,   Adȃnca vale cu arbuşti ce plȃng,   Reflexele-aurii sclipind ȋn crȃng.   Azurul mӑrii, muntele abrupt,   Poieni ce-n jurul culmilor se strȃng,   Podgorii sus şi sӑlcii dedesubt, Se-nvӑlmӑşesc ȋntr-un tablou neȋntrerupt.

  

iv. Scanning is used to identify the feet of a line. In most cases, the ideal main ictus of a poem is not wholly respected as it is counter-pointed either by the syntactical stress or by other foot types. Actually, if the main ictus of a poem were observed to perfection in a poem, that poem would be unbearably monotonous representing only a pattern for scanning, not a work of art.

The translator should be able to identify both the main ictus of the poem and the syntactic counterpoints and then make every effort to render them in the TL. An example of successful translation in point is the following:

SL	TL
A forster was he, soothly, as I guesse. There was also a Nun, a Prioress, That of her smiling was simple and coy; Her greatest oath was but by saint Eloy.                                                    (Chaucer)	Era, bag seamӑ, pӑdurean sadea. Ș-apoi, o maicӑ Starețӑ era; Sfios zȃmbea ea pururi, cu sfinție, Și nu jura decȃt pe sȋnt Elie.                                              (Dan Duțescu)

Assignment 1

Compare the three Romanian versions of the following poem by Edgar Allan Poe. First, you are to analyse the SL poem starting from its integration into a specific literary period and trend, continuing with its integration into Poe’s literary work and ending with a detailed analysis of its denotative and connotative content and of its form. Then you have to compare the rendition of all these elements in the three TL versions.

 

ELDORADO

1849

By Edgar Allan Poe

Gaily bedight,

A gallant knight,

In sunshine and in shadow,

Had journeyed long,

Singing a song,

In search of Eldorado.

           

But he grew old-

This knight so bold-

And o’er his heart a shadow

Fell as he found

No spot of ground

That looked like Eldorado.

And, as his strength

Failed him at length,

He met a pilgrim shadow-

“Shadow,” said he,

“Where can it be-

This land of Eldorado?”

                       

            “Over the Mountains

            Of the Moon,

            Down the Valley of the Shadow,

            Ride, boldly ride,”

            The shade replied-

            “If you seek for Eldorado!”

ELDORADO

Version 1 (by Emil Gulian)

                        Vesel gătit,

                        Cavaler strălucit,

            Prin soare, prin umbră,-a umblat,

                        Un cântec cântând,

                        Mereu căutând,

            Un Eldorado de mult visat.

                        Dar îmbătrâni

                        Viteazul, şi

            Pe inima lui încet a-nserat,

                        Fără să găsească

                        Zare pământească

            Să semene cu Eldorado visat.

                        Puterile câte îl îndrăgiră

                        Până la urmă îl părăsiră.

            Umbra altui pelerin s-a iscat:

                        “Umbră, spune-mi mie,

                        Pe unde să fie

            Acel Eldorado de mult visat?”

                        “Peste Munţii Lunei,

                        Dincolo de fundul,

            Marii Văi a Umbrei, un drum dezolat,

                        Mereu galopează” –

                        Zise Umbra – “cutează,

            Dacă-ntrebi de Eldorado visat.”

ELDORADO

Version 2 (by Dan Botta)

                        Leit în fier,

                        Un cavaler

            Voios a apucat-o,

                        Pe nori, pe vânt,

                        Cântând un cânt,

            Pe drum, spre Eldorado.

                        Ajuns moşneag,

                        Mândrul pribeag,

            Pe fruntea-i s-a lăsat o

                        Umbră, căci el

                        N-află de fel

            Tărâm ca Eldorado.

                        Şi-ntr-un târziu,

                        De dor pustiu,

            Pe-o umbră-a-ntâmpinat-o:

                        “Umbră, grăi,

                        Ci unde-ar fi

            Ţinutul Eldorado?”

                        “Dincolo de,

                        Ai lunii munţi,

            Pe-acolo calea-ţi ad-o,

                        În Valea Umbrii,

                        Dacă umbli

Zorind spre Eldorado.”

ELDORADO

Version 3 (by Mihu Dragomir)

                        În za de fier,

                        Un cavaler

            Prin umbră şi prin soare

                        Cântând umbla,

                        Voios zorea

            Spre-un Eldorado-n zare.

                        Îmbătrâni,

                        Viteazul şi

            O umbră-l prinse-n gheare,

                        A-ncărunţit,

                        Dar n-a găsit

            Un Eldorado-n zare.

                        Sleit, gemând,

                        Văzu, ca-n gând,

            O umbră călătoare -

                        “Tu, Umbră, ştii

                        Pe unde-o fi

            Un Eldorado-n zare?”

                        Şi umbra-a spus:

                        “Spre-al Lunii-apus,

            Spre munţi şi văi lunare

                        Necontenit

                        Mergi, de-ai pornit

            Spre-un Eldorado-n zare.”

CLUES IN TRANSLATING POETRY

According to Hegel, poetry is “the art of speaking, the totality which 
unifies the two extremes, that is the plastic arts and music, on a superior plan, in the field of spiritual inwardness itself.” The complexity of poetry seen as a synthesis of all the other arts is described more clearly by Hegel furthermore: “Just like music, poetry involves the principle of inwardness perceiving itself as inwardness; like sculpture and painting, it develops in the field of representation, intuition and feeling as an objective world."

The lyric genre raises some specific problems for a translator which shall be 
discussed upon in this article. In translating poetry, both translation and interpretation are involved. A complete analysis of the poem to be translated implies its critical interpretation. James Holmes had devised a diagram to show the interrelationship between translation and critical interpretation. (apud Bassnett, 1988:100)

Poem
Critical essay in language                                       Poem inspired by poem
of poem 
Critical essay in another language                           Poem ‘about’ poem
Prose translation                                              
Verse translation (metapoem)                                 Imitation

  Interpretation                                                                  Poetry


The verse translation rests on the axis point where types of interpretation 
intersect with types of imitation and derivation.

The translation of poetry is, according to Bantaş, the most challenging 
form of literary translation. From a strictly linguistic point of view, poetry appears as a superior form of synonymy at all levels: lexical, grammatical, syntagmatic. The first step in the translation process is a “translation-oriented text analysis” which will present the poem as a number n of elements disposed in one or more types of series, chosen or adopted by the poet. A poem may have or not a fixed form, it can be perfectly or imperfectly constant from the point of view of rhyme and metre. Its vocabulary may be either simple, belonging to everyday language, or sophisticated, full of connotations. The syntax of a poem may be either normal or distorted for the sake of versification. Its general meaning may be either explicit, clear, or esoteric, hidden. A complete analysis of a poem will thus disclose the existence of a pattern which is at the same time grammatical, stylistic and prosodic. In the case of free verse, the translator should make sure that, on the contrary, there are no patterns to be detected within the poem. 

The second stage in the translation process transforms the translator into 
a poet who is supposed to re-write the original poem in TL. In translating it, he should resort to the same structures and patterns which form the original SL code: rhymed verse or free verse or blank verse. The translator is not supposed to break these patterns or to introduce rhymes when the poet chose free verse. The same rule (no loss, no gain) should apply to the level of content: the translator is expected to reproduce the poet’s metaphors, vocabulary, style and metrical code. The poetic code of a poem, whether clear or hermetic, should remain unchanged through translation.

To summarize the ideas of Bantaş, the translator willing to and capable of 
playing the part of a poet in front of the TL audience, has two major ‘obligations’:
1. to decipher the semantic code of the original (denotation and 
connotation) as well as its formal system (images, figures of speech, prosody);
2. to render the same elements on the same levels, avoiding both semantic 
and expressive losses and semantic, expressive and clarity gains.
Through the complex analysis, the translator unveils the author’s system, 
either in general or in particular. The reproduction of this system, that is the inner mechanism of the work, can be regarded as an application of synonymy at all levels. Therefore, the ideal translator possesses a superior ‘bilingual’ linguistic competence. This linguistic competence involves his being aware of the semantic and stylistic values of the words, idioms, phrases, patterns of current language in both SL and TL. It enables him both to correctly decipher the SL code and to render it into TL as identically as The linguistic ‘bilingual’ competence, doubled by talent are not enough for a good literary translation. A literary analysis of the poem and of its literary context, not only in the SL literature, but also, comparatively, in the TL literature, is ecessary. Therefore, a superior literary competence characterizes the ideal translator. His knowledge of the poet’s entire work and also of the work of other SL and TL poets belonging to the same literary trend will make his work less difficult and undoubtedly The difficulty in translating poetry is that the translator is supposed to render as accurately as possible all the intellectual processes the poet himself has known, his emotional state, his mental disposition, his experiences and searches while trying to find the most effective (‘catchy’) word. In other words, a translator should choose the same path, either straight or winding, that the poet himself has ‘walked’ on.

After the thorough analysis of the original, when the poem becomes clear 
and entirely explicit for the translator, he runs the risk of making the poem, through his version of it, more explicit, even easier and more ostentatious than the original. That is why the analysis and interpretation of the poem are made for his own use; then, while translating, he should keep to the limits traced by the author as far as clarity is concerned. Otherwise a certain ‘gain’ in clarity may distort the author’s intention as well as the general view of the reader on the author and on his poem. Translation should neither increase nor facilitate the difficulties in understanding a poem.

In point of semantic clarity, it is easy to guess that the less explicit a poem, 
the more difficult to be translated. At the same time, the more connotations and sound effects, the more difficulties in rendering them into another language. When a translator, after having studied the critical work in point, still fails to decipher the meaning of a stanza or of an entire poem, he should rely on his own ability of decoding the meaning of the original. Sometimes, the choice between several possible interpretations can be made for the purposes of versification.

It is often claimed that hermetic poetry is untranslatable. Actually, if its 
particular code is not betrayed, a hermetic poem can be successfully translated. Bantaş states that the existence of similarities on the denotative and connotative levels between the SL and TL vocabulary represents a condition for translating a hermetic poem. The difficulties which appear in this case are divided into objective and subjective difficulties. Among the objective difficulties, one can mention polysemy (which is very rich in contemporary English, thus giving birth to ambiguities that were not originally intended by the author), implicit allusions which lead to strange or ‘local’ connotations. 

A subjective difficulty in translating hermetic poetry appears when the translator tends to betray the original code and system (by making certain meanings more esoteric or, on the contrary, more exoteric than originally intended.)

André Lefevere, quoted by Susan Bassnett, finds various methods of 
translating a poem which are deficient in that they overemphasize one or more elements of the poem at the expense of the whole. They will be mentioned here in order to mirror types of mistakes that should be avoided by a translator of poetry:
1. Phonemic translation, which attempts to reproduce the SL sound in the 
TL while at the same time producing an acceptable paraphrase of the sense. This can be successfully applied only to onomatopoeia.
2. Literal translation, where the emphasis on word-for-word translation 
distorts the sense and the syntax of the original.
3. Metrical translation, where the dominant criterion is the reproduction 
4. Poetry into prose, which leads to distortion of the sense, communicative 
value and syntax of the SL text, but not to the same extent as in the case of the literal or 
5. Rhymed translation, where the translator ‘enters into a double bondage’ 
6. Blank verse translation, where the translator changes the form of the 
original, but obtains a greater accuracy.
7. Interpretation, where the terms of version and imitation are discussed. In 
Lefevere’s view, the version retains the substance of the SL text but changes its form, and the imitation is a poem produced by the translator himself which has only ‘title and point of departure if those, in common with the source text’.

Bibiography
Bantaş, A, Croitoru, E.. 1998. Didactica traducerii,  Teora, Bucureşti.
Bassnett, S. 1988. Translation Studies, Routledge, London and New York. 
Hegel. 1979. Despre artă şi poezie, Minerva, Bucureşti.

(from E. A. Poe's Poetry in Romanian. A Critical Translation Study by Cristina Miron, Editura Universităţii din Piteşti, 2009, pp. 19-25)

Welcome to the world of poetry and translation!

Welcome to this virtual world of poetry and translation!

This blog is intended to discuss the translation of poems from English into Romanian and viceversa, so feel free to post your comments and interact when analysing translations.

I am addressing, first of all, my MA students who are engaged in this hard work of critically analysing versions of poems and, secondly, all lovers of poetry, translation, English and Romanian.